A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
