gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
