in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
