I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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