woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize
