I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
