Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize