My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
