Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
