just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
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