just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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