I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
