great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Randomize
