I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
no you cant smoke seaweed
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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