I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Randomize
