Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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