Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
