have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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