Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Randomize
