do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
