I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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