Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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