We should be called the Road Head Warriors
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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