I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
