Your mouth is God's brothel.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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