did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
