Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
