I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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