I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
