That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
It's rum buckets o'clock
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
