Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
