How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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