So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
