True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Randomize
