I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
