I am spending my child support on dildos
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
This is the high leading the old right now
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
