The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
