we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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