he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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