just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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