as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
