Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
My vagina just recognized that song.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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