These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
