i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
