I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Why is your signature on my underwear?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
