ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
