walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
