I'm really into asian looking animals
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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