therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i think i have two assholes
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Randomize
