It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
